7/18/10

Today our family went to church and I found myself asking the same question I ask every Sunday... Why is it so hard for us to get to church on time? During the week my husband is usually out the door by 7:00 and the rest of us are off to our different activities by 8:30. So why can't we all manage to get to church by 10:00? Is there a special time warp that occurs every Sunday that makes time go faster thus causing us to be late almost every Sunday? If someone could answer that question for me I would be very grateful.

I was excited to go to church today. I know I should be excited to go every Sunday but I can honestly say that sometimes it feels like a chore that eats up a portion of my weekend. However, today I was excited because we had a guest speaker, Don Piper, the author of "90 minutes in Heaven". I have not yet read Don's book but I have heard from many people that it is very good and that he is an excellent speaker. I always look forward to listening and learning from someone who can help inspire me to have a better relationship with Christ.

Don definitely did not disappoint me. He was very engaging and I really enjoyed what he had to say. His story is quite remarkable but there was a point where I started asking myself why. Why was he pronounced dead but then given another chance to live? Why had he lived through such an ordeal when so many with lesser injuries have not? Right then, Don said that he had met a woman who had asked him the same questions that were going through my head. He said she stood up during one of his appearances and asked why he had been given life when her 18 year old son who had been in an accident had not. Don said he answered the woman by first giving her his condolences. He then told her that for whatever reason, God wanted her son to come home. He explained that her child, her wonderful boy, was given to her by God. She was chosen to be the steward of this precious life but he really belonged to God. And just as God had given her this boy, He had also taken him away.

As I was sitting there, next to my 7 year old son, I felt myself overcome by emotion. I partly blame my pregnancy hormones but I also blame the fact that I was able to put myself in this poor woman's shoes. I could picture myself pleading with someone, asking why my child was taken away from me. I know that my children do not really "belong" to me although I love to take credit for them because I think they are all exceptional people. There are times I wish I could keep my children forever, tuck them away in the box in my closet where I keep all of the cards and gifts they have made me. Keep them safe and away from the world where they can be hurt. I know this is not reality and I know that I don't really want to lock them away. I love seeing them explore the world and ask questions and want to know why. All I could do to keep myself from breaking down in front of everyone was to lean over, hug my son and tell him that I love him.

That's really all I can do everyday, love my children with all my heart and try to teach them the way.